04 May 2008
Deluxe Hand Pump with Pressure Gauge and Nipple Cylinders from Extreme Restraints
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Climax Fruit Bomb Lubricant by Topco
I bought a container of the Strawberry Flavored Climax Fruit Bomb lube by Topco around the time I started dating my boyfriend. I wanted something that I could use with my hands, which would taste nice if the night progressed on to oral pleasures. The last thing I wanted to do was move from hand- to blow job only to be assaulted by a plastic, chemical-laden flavor on my tongue. I thought I had found the answer in this lube.Let it be known to all, I did not.
No answer here, people. Why, you ask? This lube got incredibly sticky, incredibly fast. I couldn’t even use it for sexy hand-stroking, because it felt like my man’s cock was covered in Smucker’s strawberry preserves…and maybe even a little week-old honey. It made such a mess on my hands that the action had to stop, and, (luckily) we had a good laugh about it. I had to get up and promptly wash my hands because it had made such a tremendous gooey mess. In fact, I think there may still be a strawberry flavored hand print on the wall in his old bedroom; kind of like a grown up version of the Willy Wonka Snozzberry wallpaper.
Also, though the lube is packaged in a very aesthetically pleasing way (a small, round bottle with brightly colored lube inside and a pump to dispense the product), the pump and lid leak something awful; before I’d even had a chance to return this nightmare, it leaked all over the cup holder in my center console. Additionally, the product is relatively expensive at $15.99 - so I would, at least, expect a more liquid-tight container for that number of my hard-earned clams.
However, the lube was flavored well…no complaints there; the strawberry flavor tasted good and left no weird aftertaste in my mouth. Unfortunately, though, the combination of leaky packaging and absolutely ineffective performance earned this lube just one star.
Pleasure Rating (out of 5):
♥
Price:
$15.99 Retail
Fascinations
Pros:
Good flavor, pretty packaging.
Cons:
Gets incredibly sticky, incredibly fast; packaging leaks.
Summary:
The lube was flavored well…the strawberry flavor tasted good and left no weird aftertaste in my mouth. Unfortunately, though, the combination of leaky packaging and absolutely ineffective performance earned this lube just one star.
Crystal Jellies Ballsy Dildo by Doc Johnson
The Crystal Jellies Ballsy dildo by Doc Johnson is a delicious toy. Well, in the most literal sense, it’s not so delicious since it’s made of jelly material and has a quite pungent plastic odor and taste. But apart from that, it’s absolutely…um…cock-a-licious.
At 5 ½” of insertable length, a nice girth and a 1 lb weight, this toy is heftier than it seems. It’s made of a smooth and jiggly jelly material (I own the pink), which provides it with a pleasurable flexibility. However, because of the jelly construction, this toy attracts and hangs on to dust and animal hair like nobody’s business. Keep that in mind when deciding where to store this guy, and always make sure you at least rinse him off before insertion into delicate areas.
Now, on to the good stuff…
The toy is exquisitely shaped, with a tasty girth and substantial head that really lets an eager pussy know who’s boss. It may require some lube to use if you’re on the smaller side like I am, but it’s worth it. The ridges/veins on the toy feel wonderful, and provide a lot of sensation on the vaginal opening when thrust in and out. My favorite use for this toy, in fact, is having my lover work it in and out of me while giving me oral. The combination of sensations is mind blowing, and the balls on the base provide a good grip for a partner or yourself to hang on to.
The toy is also harness-compatible and butt-friendly because of its flanged base and balls. Just make sure you’re ready for its girth if you want to use this for anal play…I wouldn’t suggest it for beginners. It’s inexpensive as dildos go, especially for how well it is shaped and sculpted. I gave it four stars out of five, docking one star for its odor/taste and propensity for attracting airborne particles to its shiny pink skin.
At 5 ½” of insertable length, a nice girth and a 1 lb weight, this toy is heftier than it seems. It’s made of a smooth and jiggly jelly material (I own the pink), which provides it with a pleasurable flexibility. However, because of the jelly construction, this toy attracts and hangs on to dust and animal hair like nobody’s business. Keep that in mind when deciding where to store this guy, and always make sure you at least rinse him off before insertion into delicate areas.
Now, on to the good stuff…
The toy is exquisitely shaped, with a tasty girth and substantial head that really lets an eager pussy know who’s boss. It may require some lube to use if you’re on the smaller side like I am, but it’s worth it. The ridges/veins on the toy feel wonderful, and provide a lot of sensation on the vaginal opening when thrust in and out. My favorite use for this toy, in fact, is having my lover work it in and out of me while giving me oral. The combination of sensations is mind blowing, and the balls on the base provide a good grip for a partner or yourself to hang on to.
The toy is also harness-compatible and butt-friendly because of its flanged base and balls. Just make sure you’re ready for its girth if you want to use this for anal play…I wouldn’t suggest it for beginners. It’s inexpensive as dildos go, especially for how well it is shaped and sculpted. I gave it four stars out of five, docking one star for its odor/taste and propensity for attracting airborne particles to its shiny pink skin.
Pleasure Rating (out of 5):
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Price:
$12.99 Retail
Where I bought it:
Fascinations
Pros:
Well-sculpted, great size, nicely textured.
Cons:
Attracts dust and hair, unpleasant jelly odor/taste.
Summary:
The toy is exquisitely shaped, with a tasty girth and substantial head that really let a pussy know who’s boss. It may require some lube to use if you’re on the smaller side like I am, but it’s worth it. The ridges/veins on the toy feel wonderful, and provide a lot of sensation on the vaginal opening when thrust in and out.
Incognito Lipstick Vibrator by Topco
When I first saw the Incognito Lipstick Vibe by Topco at my local naughty shop, I was tickled, well…pink…by the thought of concealing a sex toy in an innocuous lipstick package. I was dubious, however, as to how the toy would perform once the initial novelty of its girly camouflage wore off. How much power could such a thing pack? Is it really going to seem like a lipstick case once I get it away from the racks of super-realistic plastic cocks? Is it going to be discreet, or sound like a Boeing 747 taking off?All those questions were answered once I got it home.
The toy is nicely packaged; no 80s porn stars with freakishly spread vaginas on it, just a plain, pink background. And this is a plus for all those women out there who are looking for a discreet vibe that doesn’t exude an aura of raunchiness. I bought the Magenta version, but it also comes in Pink. It is slightly larger than an average lipstick tube, but if you own as much makeup as I do, no one you know will look twice if they see it in a drawer or on a desk, even if its next to a real lipcolor. The top of the case comes off to reveal the “lipstick”, which is the portion of the toy I use to stimulate my clitoris, ass and nipples. (Please note, this is not a toy for anal insertion play; but it does feel nice around the outside.) The plastic is smooth, and does the job, especially when paired with a nice dildo like the Silicone Crystal Cote.
The toy operates on one AAA battery, yet packs a surprisingly powerful punch. When turned on, it sounds just about like the average cell phone set to "vibrate". Though it only operates on one speed, that speed is plenty to get me off. It can be used to stimulate not only the clitoris and outer pussy area, but also the nipples and other erogenous zones. It slides deliciously along the body when a tiny bit of lube is applied to the “lipstick”, but I’d recommend using lube sparingly on this toy as it could get messy and unmanageably slippery in a flash. The toy’s not waterproof, so make sure to remove the battery and close it tightly before cleaning.
Overall, I would recommend the Incognito Lipstick Vibe, especially to women who want a functional, discreet and girly vibe that isn’t shaped like a penis or cute, fuzzy animal.
Pleasure Rating (out of 5):
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Price
$24.99 Retail
Where I bought it:
Fascinations
Pros:
Discreet, surprisingly powerful, easy to use.
Cons:
Only one speed, not silent enough for public use.
Summary:
Overall, I would recommend the Incognito Lipstick Vibe, especially to women who want a functional, discreet and girly vibe that isn’t shaped like a penis or cute, fuzzy animal.
Smart Balls by FunFactory
The Smart Balls by Fun Factory are a toy that I, in my oh-so-humble opinion, believe should be in every woman’s toy box. I ordered my black-and-silver set of these wündertoys from here at EdenFantasys, after reading a whole slew of great reviews. This being my first set of any kind of vaginal balls, I was a little skeptical about how non-vibrating toys could be as stimulating as all the reviews stated. But they are, reader…oh how they are.
After unwrapping the Smart Balls upon their arrival at my boyfriend’s door, I couldn’t wait to try them out. However, I was initially a little taken aback by their size. I knew they were meant to stay inside me for extended periods of time, yet these seemed like an insertable toy that wouldn’t allow for much mobility once in use. The nicely packaged balls came with great instructions, however; not just for usage but for care and cleaning as well. And as an added bonus, the instructions were in several languages, which made me, and my vagina, feel pretty damn cosmopolitan.
I took the newly-loosed toy into the bathroom for insertion and testing. The Smart Balls came with a little package of lubricant, which helped ease my fears (and my vajay) about getting them inside. The lube was perfectly adequate to the task, and after giving the balls a thorough greasing, I started to insert them.
I went slowly, inserting one segment of the connected balls at a time; relaxing and accommodating one before sliding the other ball in. Despite how large they seemed at the outset, the Smart Balls fit quite nicely inside of me; not too long and girthy enough to create a pleasantly full sensation without feeling stretched.
The Smart Balls are weighted balls that are coated in smooth silicone, with a silicone pull-cord for ease of cleaning and hygienic use. The inner set of balls (picture a cat’s bell, with its outer casing and inner ball which, when they clang against each other, creates the tinkling sound) creates a subtle yet very noticeable percussion when the user moves, stands up, sits down, bounces, swing dances, whatever. They are great for use as Kegel exercise companions, since they give those muscles a source of resistance against which to flex and strengthen. They also just feel great, whether you’re doing Kegels or not.
I have found that the Smart Balls can be left in, very comfortably, for many hours at a time. I like to wear them while out shopping, studying, or making dinner; they create wonderful vibrating sensations silently and discretely enough for public use. They are easy to clean, and since they’re silicone, can be sanitized with a dip in some boiling water. Make sure to use a water-based lube for insertion, if you need it; a silicone lube will damage this toy.
I enthusiastically recommend the Smart Balls for their superior construction, ease of use, and absolutely incredible, yet discreet, pleasure-inducing properties.
Pleasure Rating (out of 5):
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
After unwrapping the Smart Balls upon their arrival at my boyfriend’s door, I couldn’t wait to try them out. However, I was initially a little taken aback by their size. I knew they were meant to stay inside me for extended periods of time, yet these seemed like an insertable toy that wouldn’t allow for much mobility once in use. The nicely packaged balls came with great instructions, however; not just for usage but for care and cleaning as well. And as an added bonus, the instructions were in several languages, which made me, and my vagina, feel pretty damn cosmopolitan.
I took the newly-loosed toy into the bathroom for insertion and testing. The Smart Balls came with a little package of lubricant, which helped ease my fears (and my vajay) about getting them inside. The lube was perfectly adequate to the task, and after giving the balls a thorough greasing, I started to insert them.
I went slowly, inserting one segment of the connected balls at a time; relaxing and accommodating one before sliding the other ball in. Despite how large they seemed at the outset, the Smart Balls fit quite nicely inside of me; not too long and girthy enough to create a pleasantly full sensation without feeling stretched.
The Smart Balls are weighted balls that are coated in smooth silicone, with a silicone pull-cord for ease of cleaning and hygienic use. The inner set of balls (picture a cat’s bell, with its outer casing and inner ball which, when they clang against each other, creates the tinkling sound) creates a subtle yet very noticeable percussion when the user moves, stands up, sits down, bounces, swing dances, whatever. They are great for use as Kegel exercise companions, since they give those muscles a source of resistance against which to flex and strengthen. They also just feel great, whether you’re doing Kegels or not.
I have found that the Smart Balls can be left in, very comfortably, for many hours at a time. I like to wear them while out shopping, studying, or making dinner; they create wonderful vibrating sensations silently and discretely enough for public use. They are easy to clean, and since they’re silicone, can be sanitized with a dip in some boiling water. Make sure to use a water-based lube for insertion, if you need it; a silicone lube will damage this toy.
I enthusiastically recommend the Smart Balls for their superior construction, ease of use, and absolutely incredible, yet discreet, pleasure-inducing properties.
Pleasure Rating (out of 5):
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Price:
$22.99 Retail
EdenFantasys
Pros:
Easy to use, easy to clean, provide wonderful sensations, can be used in public.
Cons:
I can't really think of any.
Summary:
I enthusiastically recommend the Smart Balls for their superior construction, ease of use, and absolutely incredible, yet discreet, pleasure-inducing properties.
02 May 2008
Silicone Crystal Cote by California Exotic
The Silicone Crystal Cote by California Exotic is simply one of the best insertable toys I’ve ever used. I own the fuchsia and clear version, and it checks in at an insertable length of 4 ½”, with a diameter of 1 ¼”. It is made of silicone, so if you plan on lubing it up, make sure your slip-‘n-slide is water-based. The toy has only a slight plastic scent; nothing overpowering or unpleasant, which is a plus for me since I enjoy sucking and licking my toys as a part of my play. If it smells and/or tastes like a car tire, it’s likely to knock my enthusiasm down a notch or two. And at just about thirty dollars, it’s a completely economical addition to anyone’s toy collection… beginner and veteran alike.
The Crystal Cote is certainly on the smaller side when it comes to dildos, but that’s how I prefer them. If you are a size queen or just generally like a large toy to stretch you, this is probably not the one for you. However, if you find yourself intimidated by the larger size of many toys out there, I highly suggest you try out this product. With this clear and pink wonder, you don’t have to sacrifice high-quality, pussy-pleasing realism for a more petite size.
The suction cup on the base, which is one of its most versatile features, sticks to everything I've tried: the top of a stool, the wall, the edge of my bathtub, and the tile in the shower. Because of the suction base’s design, the toy springs and interacts ever so slightly while I fuck it, and with each thrust, the wonderfully textured balls press against my ass contributing to the overall intensity of the experience. The suction base also functions as a handle, making it an amazing toy for use in partner play as well.
The shaping of the head and shaft is exquisite; ridged and textured, perfectly proportioned, and the head pops in and out of me deliciously when I use it for thrusting (it beats out all of my other dildos in this regard, hands down). Combined with clitoral stimulation, the in-and-out sensations elicited by this luscious toy make for an absolutely incredible orgasm. I highly recommend the Silicone Crystal Cote to anyone looking for a high-quality, realistic, smaller-sized dildo.
The Crystal Cote is certainly on the smaller side when it comes to dildos, but that’s how I prefer them. If you are a size queen or just generally like a large toy to stretch you, this is probably not the one for you. However, if you find yourself intimidated by the larger size of many toys out there, I highly suggest you try out this product. With this clear and pink wonder, you don’t have to sacrifice high-quality, pussy-pleasing realism for a more petite size.
The suction cup on the base, which is one of its most versatile features, sticks to everything I've tried: the top of a stool, the wall, the edge of my bathtub, and the tile in the shower. Because of the suction base’s design, the toy springs and interacts ever so slightly while I fuck it, and with each thrust, the wonderfully textured balls press against my ass contributing to the overall intensity of the experience. The suction base also functions as a handle, making it an amazing toy for use in partner play as well.
The shaping of the head and shaft is exquisite; ridged and textured, perfectly proportioned, and the head pops in and out of me deliciously when I use it for thrusting (it beats out all of my other dildos in this regard, hands down). Combined with clitoral stimulation, the in-and-out sensations elicited by this luscious toy make for an absolutely incredible orgasm. I highly recommend the Silicone Crystal Cote to anyone looking for a high-quality, realistic, smaller-sized dildo.
Pleasure Rating (out of 5):
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Price:
$29.99 Retail
Where I bought it:
EdenFantasys
Pros:
Exquisitely shaped, nicely textured, suction cup base, affordable.
Cons:
May be too small for some.
Summary:
The in-and-out sensations elicited by this luscious toy make for an absolutely incredible orgasm. I highly recommend the Silicone Crystal Cote to anyone looking for a high-quality, realistic, smaller-sized dildo.
Glass Ben Wa Balls by Topco
I’ve always been curious, yet a little terrified, about Ben Wa balls. The concept of inserting two free-floating marbles into my vagina always prompted me to envision them migrating up, inexplicably, into my uterus and clanking around like quarters at the bottom of my purse. Since I’m a smart little girl, though, I understand that this is not really possible, hence the curiosity portion of the above double-edged sword.
After trying Smart Balls, which are absolutely amazing, I decided to finally try a pair of the individual Ben Wa balls. My boyfriend and I had found a set of the Glass Ben Wa Balls by Topco in our favorite adult store, and resolved to buy them.
I decided on this specific set, as opposed to a pair of gold metal ones, first and foremost because of their packaging and appearance. These little toys by Topco are very pretty, and were the first glass Ben Wa balls I’d ever seen… not to mention the first with delicate flowers encased inside. Additionally, they come in their own sturdy, visually appealing maroon and black storage box. The balls are 3 ¼” in circumference, which, in print seems large, but they’re actually quite small. Made of Pyrex glass, they’re seamless and easily cleaned and sterilized.
After cleaning the toys, I nervously inserted them, which was easy enough. They popped gently inside of me, and sort of disappeared. I was planning on using them throughout the day, both to increase resistance for Kegel exercises, and to see if the manufacturer’s claim that “they also induce powerful orgasms in some women just by the friction created as they rub against one another” was indeed true. I wasn’t sure this was going to be possible, since once the balls were in, I couldn’t feel a thing.
They did provide a bit of resistance for the Kegels, but not much, and certainly not nearly as much as the Smart Balls. Also, I never did feel them inside of me, bouncing around as many say they do. And, once I decided to take them out, I was in for a time consuming stress-fest. I had to actually put multiple fingers inside of my vajay, and press on the outside of my lower abdomen to induce them out of me, which brought back all of those fears of losing them. However, after 8-10 minutes of digging, they came out.
The main reason I will keep these and not return them: they’re pretty and I feel sexy having them inside of me. Note that I didn’t say “feel sexy *feeling* them inside of me”, because I really didn’t. But they’re a nice, subtle way to keep your erotic consciousness going during the day, when you might not want overt physical stimulation to distract you. All in all, I would recommend these for only that reason; wear them if you want to feel sexy by having a pretty, feminine set of toys inside of you… buy the Smart Balls for Kegels and incredible sensations.
After trying Smart Balls, which are absolutely amazing, I decided to finally try a pair of the individual Ben Wa balls. My boyfriend and I had found a set of the Glass Ben Wa Balls by Topco in our favorite adult store, and resolved to buy them.
I decided on this specific set, as opposed to a pair of gold metal ones, first and foremost because of their packaging and appearance. These little toys by Topco are very pretty, and were the first glass Ben Wa balls I’d ever seen… not to mention the first with delicate flowers encased inside. Additionally, they come in their own sturdy, visually appealing maroon and black storage box. The balls are 3 ¼” in circumference, which, in print seems large, but they’re actually quite small. Made of Pyrex glass, they’re seamless and easily cleaned and sterilized.
After cleaning the toys, I nervously inserted them, which was easy enough. They popped gently inside of me, and sort of disappeared. I was planning on using them throughout the day, both to increase resistance for Kegel exercises, and to see if the manufacturer’s claim that “they also induce powerful orgasms in some women just by the friction created as they rub against one another” was indeed true. I wasn’t sure this was going to be possible, since once the balls were in, I couldn’t feel a thing.
They did provide a bit of resistance for the Kegels, but not much, and certainly not nearly as much as the Smart Balls. Also, I never did feel them inside of me, bouncing around as many say they do. And, once I decided to take them out, I was in for a time consuming stress-fest. I had to actually put multiple fingers inside of my vajay, and press on the outside of my lower abdomen to induce them out of me, which brought back all of those fears of losing them. However, after 8-10 minutes of digging, they came out.
The main reason I will keep these and not return them: they’re pretty and I feel sexy having them inside of me. Note that I didn’t say “feel sexy *feeling* them inside of me”, because I really didn’t. But they’re a nice, subtle way to keep your erotic consciousness going during the day, when you might not want overt physical stimulation to distract you. All in all, I would recommend these for only that reason; wear them if you want to feel sexy by having a pretty, feminine set of toys inside of you… buy the Smart Balls for Kegels and incredible sensations.
Pleasure Rating (out of 5):
♥ ♥
Price:
$11.99 Retail
Where I bought it:
Fascinations
Pros:
Pretty, nicely packaged, seamless, easy to clean/sterilize.
Cons:
Can't feel them once inside, difficult to get out.
Summary:
The main reason I will keep these and not return them: they’re pretty and I feel sexy having them inside of me. Note that I didn’t say “feel sexy feeling them inside of me”, because I really didn’t. But they’re a nice, subtle way to keep your erotic consciousness going during the day, when you might not want overt physical stimulation to distract you.
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